also, a note on self talk or what I hear from others and a memory...

You only has as much value

As needing to manipulate you

Because you are in the way

And present

So not really any value at all

Because we use you for our benefit

Because you are around

And otherwise we would have to put money into you

Energy into you

To work around you

Like a child of our own or something

So that money is going to be whatever we want be because we are the ones looking at you

And if we want to be mean and manipulate you for evil we will

And if we are like that than possibly not even just manipualted you for evil for our own selves but for other people too...

Making ourselves of more benefit to more people

In a healthy reciprocation of energy

But not onviously

But this whole time I was thinking that I was meant to teach and inspire the village raising the child

And that each presence of a person

Or each person present

Has value

And is worth something

In their own right

In our lives

Rather,

That each individual has an individual value from their own life

And that it can offer something

Or we can learn to gain something in our own lives

By appreciating the person

And their presence when in our life

Much like an aunt

Is technically, or could technically have more value than gifts at a holiday

And that their life experience, travel stories,

Sharing their learning processes and stories of experience and perception

Could be useful and helpful

And that was part of the message of the Renassaince festivals,

Is that it replicates the village,

The apprenticing opportunities with skilled labour

Or life skills learned from needed skills, or an art,

The different characters we might encounter in our day when out and about,

And the adventures of love and politics,

And learning about the world and the cultures of other places such as china and the spice trade,

I had already been saying it takes a village to raise children,

And I was excited for learning how to share my experience with my family as a different character and a relative,

Because we had not learned to include different characters in our lives, it was just us and we didn't have a lot of interaction with different types of people or even a lot of friends,

Just the minimum needed for healthy interactions,

Just like Alice in wonderland and through the looking glass, I had adventures in life

And could even be the sad Aunt still waiting for her love into old age,

Rumors of romance that can be had in life,

But anyway,

The value argument is stupid if I killed you for being mean to me,

So, really,

We each have value,

And a life,

And yeah...